Bring me thunder, bring me lightning, bring me all things that are frightening! Bring me monsters, I'll enjoy them, bring me phantoms I'll destroy them! BRING ME GIANTS!

You know how sometimes you hear music and it's nice and exciting and it makes you feel better? And then sometimes you hear music and it gets into your soul, and makes you feel stronger, and braver, and all freaking inspired? I love music like that.

James Barbour has a CD called "Bring Me Giants," which is one of the most epic, awe-inspiring masterpieces I have ever had the pleasure of listening to. It makes me feel like I can take on the world. RAWR! BRING ME GIANTS!! I AM DAVID!!! YAAAAAAAAAS!!!

This CD is incredible. It inspires me to write music. It really inspires my musicals, which is both exciting and stressful. 'Cause here is the thing. I really love writing lyrics and I really love writing musicals. But okay, I'm relying on my Middle-School-Music memory and that is hard. Also, how do you write music when you don't play multiple instruments or have immense understanding of music theory?? Let me tell you, there is nothing quite like having inspiration for music and lyrics and epic orchestras, and sitting there like, I DON'T KNOW MUSIC LIKE THAT! It's sad!

Oh, on top of that I'm trying to compose music using a Piano App on my phone.

You don't know the struggle unless you've tried this yourself.

Why are phones screens so small? For real. I sit there like, Plink- no - Plunk, Piiiing?... - that's not right - Pling, Plaaaiiiing - AHA! *furious scribbles cords A4 and D4 on sheet of paper* Right. PLOOOOooong. Pleeeeng. PLOOOOOooooooNK.... no - Pleeeeeeeeeeeenk.

The struggle is real. For once my fingers are too big! I can only play one note at a time.

What I really need is one of those big electrical piano keyboards. The ones that are all portable and stuff. And you can Plug In other instruments.

Like dis.

#ChristmasWishList

It's hard wanting to write music and hitting walls because you're not a musical genius. It's hard wanting to act and not being able to because you can't drive yet. It's hard to be artistic and have to work. 8-P I want to write, I want to act, I want to take music theory, I want to use my talents to spread some good, even if it's small. I really want to start practicing my clarinet again because I think that would help with making music. I would have done this already, but my sadly it's in storage and I haven't been able to dig it out of the garage yet. 8-(

With all of these dreams stretched out before me, I come to a big decision. If you could all pray for me it would be very helpful, because I'm really nervous about it.

I've decided to step out of my nanny job.

This was a hard decision for me, one that I've been considering it for some time. You know how sometimes you do something and it's just not quite a fit? Well, that's what happened. I love both my nieces tons and will miss them a lot, but I can feel that this isn't where I'm supposed to be. Joe and Jess have been very good to me and I've had a good sort of year... but I do think it's time for a change. There is so much I'm not able to do here. Joe's house is in this cul-de-sac thing, and all connections to town are off the freeway, which I hate. There is nowhere I can go within walking or riding distance. I still don't have my license. *growls* I've also been missing Mass a lot due to conflicting schedules and work hours and such, and that has been hard. There is also a lot of stuff I need to figure out and I think this is for the best. I've been praying a lot about this decision, and if some of you could pray for me as well I would be very grateful. 8-D I hope to come back here soon, since it has more opportunities for actors, but before I can do that I need to give myself a little room to breathe, take a step back, and say, What do you want, Bella?

I mean, I know I want to act - and I even found a good Community Theatre group down here, which I'd like to join as soon as possible. I want to audition for their Spring Show which is The Secret Garden. If I like it, I can think about moving back into this town, but doing so on my terms, and in the places I want to be.

Anyway, please pray about my dreams, please pray that I can pursue my acting, even if it's in a small way, and please pray that these changes are right. 8-)


I'm working on another blog post, so you should be hearing from me soon. I hope you all have a good weekend!

*swings around cape and leaps off stage*

Bella

An Announcement and some Other things

I AM OFFICIALLY MAKING AN ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!

Starting May 10th I will be hosting a CIVIL WAR BLOG PARTY ON MY BLOG! It will last a week and explore all sorts of themes!!!

whose side are you on?

You kind of have to see the movie in order to participate in this Blog Party. However I, Kind Blogger that I am, gave you some breathing room. As long as you post during May and link back to me you can still participate in my fun!!!

I am still figuring out the rules, but I will post Days/Themes by the end of the month. If any of you have ideas for this blog party to throw my way, go right ahead! I am really flexible and we can even lengthen thing if we have to. 8-)

ISN'T THIS EXCITING??? I AM SUPER EXCITED!

I had so many goals this year guys. One of them was to start Vlogging. *laughs* Okay. There is actually a good reason why I haven't done this. My camera was sort of borrowed long-term and I haven't had the ability to film myself in months. I want to try and get my camera back in May, and then start Vlogging. I think it would be really great for me to have an outlet besides writing. I love writing, but so often acting out scenes helps me to write. I want to attempt short skits, maybe tell some of my short stories, and even the stories that are just about me and my crazy life. I wan to do stage-acting and Broadway-acting, but I also want to be like a bard, a storyteller. That is something that is so rare right now, and I would HATE to see it die. If I could have a little stage and a story to tell, complete with acting, I'd be happy. I want that. I just want to be on stage. I want to tell stories because I am part  of the stories. It isn't an easy dream, but it's one I want to try for, if I can.

I could use a few prayers in these next month. I have to take my drivers test in the summer, and I would really like to pass... so prayers would be really welcome.

I want to get back into proper blogging too. I am getting super rusty.

ANYWAY! Have a lovely week. Do lots of fun stuff. Be safe and God bless! PEACE OUT Y'ALL!!!

*swings around cape and leaps off stage*

Bella

A bit about stories and other stuff.

"He was too quiet or he was too loud. He took things too seriously, or not seriously at all. He was too sensitive, or too cold-hearted. He hated with every fiber of his being, or loved with every piece of his heart."  (Stacy Hunt)

I have seen this quote floating around for a long time. It is a line that has intrigued me since the moment I saw it. It sparked my inner writer, and for many months a thought lurked in the back of my mind, a thought I hardly dare consider. The thought was that a character like this would be something of a challenge, and I should attempt to write one. The thought would not leave me alone and eventually a character showed up that was angry, and bitter, yet he could love, if only someone would love him. He asked me to write his story. I agreed. But since this quote was a massive inspiration for this character I am a little terrified to write about him.

His name is Whip. And he is Shadow.

"Nothing in my life is constant."

This year I have to try to figure out Whip's story. At the beginning of the month I made myself a promise, a kind of resolution, to write more. Especially to write more of the stories that I have been so afraid to put down on paper. Whip will probably be the first I really work on, but I also want to work on the story about England in the 1600's during the reign of Queen Elizabeth. The story about Cyril and the Keara. I want to write tell the story about a girl who gets her heart broken over and over again, but still wants to love.  I want to write the characters that have been drifting around in the dusty corners, just waiting to be let out. I want to go back to working on my plays and musicals, which deserve so much better than just being abandoned. I want to try to be a proper sort of writer this year. Though I'm not sure how well that will work out.

I also want to sign up for dance and try to find an acting school somewhere near by. I really need to start focusing more on my acting, looking at scrips, analyzing characters, working with emotion and response. I have to start driving again too, so I can get my license. I have a busy sort of year ahead of me, and that is a little daunting. But it is kind of nice to have plans.

I'm going to try really hard to do things this year. I need to be brave and just do things. I don't much like doing things that scare me, but I have to try. If you could all keep me in my prayers I would be most thankful. :)

Would you like me to start posting about my plots/stories again? Would you like to hear more about my new characters?  It's all up to you! PEACE OUT Y'ALL!

*swings around cape and leaps off stage*

Bella

Oh, yeah I'm supposed to blog here....

Apologies in advance if this post feels a little random. I'm tired and sick.

Yesterday wass the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. In the Catholic Church, this is the Day the Mary, Mother of God and Queen of Heaven, was conceived in the womb of her mother, free of Original sin.

"Hail, full of Grace, The Lord is with thee!"

We've started the second week of Advent. I explain Advent every year, so I think most people know what it is at this point. Advent is just the four weeks before Christmas during which Catholics prepare for Christ's coming by doing extra prayer and sacrifice.  I love Advent. For me, that is the start of the Christmas season. On the First Sunday of Advent, Mom pulls out the Nativity set, but she only put's in one statue; the lamb. And every Sunday for the rest of Advent, we put another statue into the Nativity scene. On Christmas Eve we put in Mary, and on Christmas Morning we bring out the Christ Child and set Him in the manger. It is fabulous. 

I seems I ought to give you a quick life-update. I am a terrible blogger, so every time I blog I end up dumping a ton of information on you. This time I will just try and stick with the important stuff. 'Kay? :)

I spent all morning cleaning. I stayed the night with my brother so I could help at with Chloe and Sammi, and I thought we could clean the house nice and pretty for Dad.... and it took for freaking ever. It's a good thing Tiny decided to stay the night with me, otherwise I never would have finished. Even as it was, we were working for something like three hours. Haha. Fun.

After that, I tried to write. But I didn't. Okay, I was supposed to do NaNo last month, but unfortunately that didn't work. I think NaNo puts too much pressure on me to write, and I end up making mistakes, and my stories don't turn out right because I force too much stuff down on paper. I think NaNo can be helpful. I think it really depends on my mood, the story I'm working on, and the amount of planning or world-building the story requires. All my new stories require a lot of world building, so I just need more than thirty days to get the story down on paper. I'm turning into one of those 500-words-a-day writers. I want to attempt a romance story this year. I've actually had an idea for one for a long time, I'm just worried to write it out. Romances usually end up being weird... and I think it would be hard to write, since I've never you know, been in love.

this gif.

Honestly, I haven't been doing as much writing as I should. I think I am too anxious to write. In like, a month, I am going to move in with my brother so I can nanny my two adorable nieces. I am kind of freaking out! I am excited, but scared, if you know what I mean. I mean, once I leave I will earn money and I can pay for dance classes and acting classes, and figure out the whole acting thing that I really want to pursue, but I am so scared! I'm really scared to learn dance. Dance teachers have a reputation of being terrifying. And I met one once. She was like, IF YOU CAN'T TAKE THE PAIN. DON'T PLAY.

This sounds pretty intense for beginning dance!

But on the other hand, if I really want to pursue Theatre - which I do - I have to know dance. So I'm at least gonna try. I have to try. My plan is to start off with beginning ballet and work my way up from there. Because ballet is the foundation of all dance!

I feel bad. This post was going to be really long and amazing, but I'm really tired and my head hurts. It's time I head off to bed, but I hope you all enjoyed hearing from me. I'll post again when I'm a little more awake and my energy levels are better.

Peace out y'all!

*swings around cape and leaps off stage*

Bella.

My Idea

What's up fellas?

Before I began this post, I have an announcement to make! I have done a thing! A GREAT BIG THING!!! I have started a petition to get A Tale of Two Cities released on DVD.

The Tenth Doctor

I really, really need help promoting this. If there is anyone you know who enjoys musicals, or if YOU enjoy musicals, please take a few moments of your time and sign the petition, and send the message to others. It would mean so much to me. I don't know if it will work - it might not. But I have to try. I can't express how grateful I would be for your support.

SIGN THE PETITION

I know. I'm a silly goose. Aaaaaaanyway.

Now it's time for my epic IDEA reveal. As you all know, I really, REALLY love musical theater. It is my big dream to be apart of that world. It may be a few months before I can actually get on a stage, so I had a brilliant idea. I have this extra youtube channel that just sits around collecting dust, being of no use, and I thought, what if I used that to help promote my acting?

A lot of people do this thing on Youtube where they will start a channel and do "Web-isodes." It's kind of like your own mini TV show. For a few months I've played with the idea of starting my own Web-isodes, but I didn't know how much time I could put into it, and I didn't just want to jump headlong into a project if I would have to give it up in a few weeks. Another big thing is space. I don't have anywhere to set up a 'stage.' My house is small and my room is smaller, and anyway, little children have a bad habit of barging into rooms uninvited. I also was concerned about costumes/cast. Cause let's face it; I am like, the only actress in my family. (My sisters can act, but they don't like acting. Not like I do :D )

These were all very valid excuses, but that was what they were. Excuses. A couple months ago I went to a fair in my town, and there was this really cool Bard telling stories. He fascinated me, and I thought to myself, "I want to do that." After I watched him tell his Jack Frost story I got to thinking, and I realized that I could begin my channel like that. I could do Webisdoes as a sort of Bard.

This idea really appeals to me and I think it would be a ton of fun to pursue. I am a story teller. I have been my whole life. I remember being really little and making up these stories to tel my younger sisters. Whenever I had a free moment, whenever I was alone or bored, I would wander away and creates entire worlds and characters in my head. I would sit with my legs crossed in the backyard, staring at nothing, building worlds. People used to think I was talking to myself, but really I was playing my characters and acting out the different scenes. Telling stories is my absolute favorite thing to do, it makes me so incredibly happy. That's why I write, that's why I create lyrics, that is especially why I act. My favorite type of story telling has always been the stage. There is nothing else like it in the whole world. Where else can you take on a new name, take on an identity, have a whole different life, and literally LIVE a story for your audience to enjoy?? There is nowhere else in the world!

Okay, I'm getting a little off track here. Ummmmmmm. Right. The channel. SO!! What it comes down to is this. I am going to spend the next couple of weeks preparing for my Channel Opening. It will happen sometime in October, though I'm not sure when. I'm not sure how it will work yet exactly, but I think I am going to do a mix of old folk tales, fairy tales and myths of my own making. It should be fun and terrifying and a little tiny bit stressful and I will probably freak out a lot, but I think once I get a foot under me, I will really enjoy it.


..... That's all I've got. I had to write something tonight because I am a truly terrible blogger and I shouldn't wait so long between posts. And this idea was very exciting and I just had to share it. Now I'm done. Have a good night everyone, and God Bless!

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!

*swings around cape and leaps off stage.*

Bella

In which I muse. (Hey. I'm trying.)

I bet you didn't think I would post today.

I almost didn't.

But I am.

Hai!

You may applaud me now.

How have you all been? I've been great! Well except for the getting sick and having a head-cold that keeps me feeling tired all day... yeah great! I am so excited! Summer is finally here and that means bare feet and reading and days by the lake and hikes and sitting in the shade with a notebook writing, writing, WRITING! I had a thought the other day. Kind of a thought that came to me around 3:20 A.M or so. When I was half-asleep and almost dreaming but not quite. My thought was this. What is I wrote a script over the summer?

The sane half of me yelled out in anguish but the actor side of me - the insane side of me - thought how cool would it be to write a musical?

I have been OBSESSED with musicals lately. Sometimes I get on these highs and all I want to do is listen to musicals. I think that is my favorite type of storytelling. I have always wanted to attempt writing a script, but I've never quite gotten up the courage to do so. However I have a sort of plot now and maybe I will try It. What could it hurt? I'll need help with the music writing itself though, and that is the down side.

I just really want to write a musical you guys!!!!!

In light of this idea, I want to try to start reading scripts too. I need to learn how they flow and (especially) how to break down characters. It is something that really excites me - learning about a character. I think I am a little odd though cause I don't do it the normal way. I just tackle the character head on and then start climbing up the learning peak and find out more and more what kind of person it is. I know I should take more time with character study of course - for an actress that is crucial - it just is something I don't do too much. It's a resolution. Hopefully I can live up to it.

But I know what you are thinking. You're wondering what else I have been up to during my (long?) absence. Well, I painted my room, which is nice because it has been the same color for a while now and it's fun to have a change every now and then. Tiny and I picked out this soft light purple and I love how it turned out. It made our whole room look warm and cozy with a touch of Spring to it. It also makes our room look a lot cleaner and I like that. We had to move around all the furniture and stuff so we took advantage of the situation and packaged up some of my sister's nick-knacks and books. I have to say the room looks much less cluttered now. I don't even know how there was that much in the room. It was shocking.

It was a lot of fun painting though. We listened to four musicals in a row one of the days and I was able to sing along with almost all of the songs - (With Phantom I can sing them ALL) That was a total blast! Musicals man. It's like I can't get enough of them right now. All of my younger sisters are starting to get a twitch because I have been listening to musicals not stop for about... two months. But I don't care because now I know almost all of Tale of Two Cities and I'm excited! I want to play in that musical. It is on of my dreams. That and being Christine. *that might actually be a possibility. 

I performed my second solo in singing class and got RAVE reviews. If Pandy will let me maybe I can sing The Climb on her channel. That would be kind of fun. I was happy. See, I had this awful head cold and for most the past few days I've been cracking every time I get too strong. So I was really afraid I'd crack during my performance. But I said a prayer and God was good to me. I did a brilliant job and it was crack free! I was even given compliments on my projection and emotion.

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW FUN IT IS TO BE COMPLIMENTED!

Besides those few things not much is going on. I am reading Brother's in Arms again and it hurts WAY worse this time because it's been picked to death and everything flows better and is tighter and just more full and brilliant and painful. Franz hurts! He hurt before but now he is even worse and I think he has made it to my top five favorite book characters ever! HE ISN'T A MONSTER HE IS A SAD DYSFUNCTIONAL PUPPY! I LOVE HIM.

Oh yeah, I'm also trying to finish up my LOTR review. I feel really bad that I haven't gotten that posted yet, but its a hard subject to approach. Because.... Lord of the Rings! I want to get it done soon though. It is almost finished.

Righto. I have a bed to climb into and music to listen to. PEACE OUT Y'ALL!

*swings around cape and leaps from stage.*

 

 

 

Bella

I have exactly nine days of school left.

CAN YOU FREAKIN BELIEVE IT??

I am so close to being done with school that I feel light-headed and a little sick. And I think I am excited until I think about being an adult and having responsibility and then I am like...

*takes a moment to think.* "No."

It isn't just graduating either. See, I have a plan. It is a terrifying plan. At the end of the summer I am planning to move off the hill with my brother and nanny for his kids. And take an acting class at a big college. With other actors. And I have to learn to drive. And it scares the crap out of me, because WHAT IF I FAIL?? AND WHAT IF THIS IS THE WORST PLAN EVER?? AND AM I REALLY MOVING SO SOON????????

I'm overwhelmed.

Luckily I wont be too far from home so I will be able to visit pretty often, but I'm still freaked out. I need lots of prayers, especially about my driving. Y'all need to pray I can learn to drive by August. 

My brother is all...

I believe in you!

and I'm like

This is too much

I love my brother. He is very excited for me. He just wants me to be happy and act and do stuff on broadway and he is so incredibly supportive. Like, really supportive. Really really supportive. Like, LET ME HELP YOU LIVE YOUR DREAM! WE CAN DO ALL THE THINGS!

And I kind of go... "Okay. But maybe uhm... slow down a little?"

Did I mention I love my brother? Cause I do. A lot. 

Okay that is out of the way. I want to ride my bike every day this summer, so today I took my first bike-ride of the year. LOL. That was funny. I didn't take a long ride because I knew I wouldn't be used to bike riding, but even though I took a short ride I still came back with my legs wobbly. And they wanted to kick out when I walked. It was weird. I forgot how weird it was to walk after riding for the first time in months. You feel disconnected from yourself. 

Jelly legs!!

 Guess what else today is!! Today is May 6th. For some reason it sounded familiar and I thought this must be some significant day. So I looked it up and I figured out why it sounded familiar. On May 6th, 1541 King Henry the VIII ordered that a bible be placed in every church in England. Applaud me, I am a giant nerd. How did I know that? I have no idea. 

Apparently it May sixth is also the date that the NY to SF footrace began. But that happened in 1929. And on this same day in 1604, the Spanish poet Leon VII published his first poem.

You learn something knew every day don't you?

I am currently studying for finals, writing out the history of my fictional world and making a new video to the Eleventh Doctor. I am also reading The Conspiracy of Kings and feeling a severe lack of Eugenides. But I like Sophos. Sophos is great. Sophos is brilliant. Sophos is not Eugenides. And he doesn't try to be. I thank him for that because he is good as just Sophos. 

SOPHOS HO! 

Time for me to scamper off. OH! One last thing! Treskie over at Occasional Randomness  is doing a giveaway! you should check it out. It's pretty cool. 

With that I am gone! PEACE OUT Y'ALL!

*slides off car*

Bella

What next?

I totally singed my skin off the other night. that was dramatic. What I meant was, I dropped a bunch of boiling water and scorched a good six inches of my leg right on the side of my calf. It hurt. A lot. And now I have a massive red burn and this silly bandage that makes me feels heavy and slow. I can't run very well. And it keeps trying to scab so then I move and it cracks and I hobble. It's really annoying. I never realized how much I moved until suddenly I was falling over myself. More than usual, that is.

.

Now at least I know what it's like for my poor book characters.


Speaking of my characters, right now I am reading a book about Gladiators. I am hoping to write my own story in May sometime so I have to read as much as I can before then. I am really excited about my Gladiator book and I'll probably release the plot within a few days, maybe longer if I get super busy. But I'll try hard not to delay too long. I also have this plan. to start writing again and set aside time to read and all that stuff. Why is there no time to do anything anymore?

 I should be done with school in two weeks. Two. I am freaking out a little because finishing school means life-ing and I don't know if I am ready to Life. With that being said, I actually do have a plan for after I graduate. I am going to go to school for acting. I am going to try and get myself into one of those Group Theater people and go on Broadway. I just need a job. But I have an opportunity knocking right now, so please pray hard about that.

It's true.

Okay. I have posted.  And it's  probably the most boring post in history.

On the upside I'll be doing my Lord of the Rings post in just a bit! Stay tuned!

*slides off car* 

Bella

Happy Odin's Day

So I'm seventeen now. 

Stiles Stilinski. AKA The-only-reason-I-watch-Teen-Wolf

I was going to do a blog post on Monday - My Birthday. A big epic one with lots of pictures. 

As you can see that didn't make it off my bucket list.

Heh.

It was a good birthday though. I spent it NOT doing writing, but listening to music and jotting down answers to American Government and bashing socialism into the ground. 

WELCOME TO NEW YORK!!!!

IT'S BEEN WAITING FOR YOU

WELCOME TO NEW YORK, WELCOME TO NEW YORK!!!!

Btw, I really like Taylor's new CD. Just sayin.

I finished school pretty early and My Lovely Friend Sammie B. came over for the night. We had  this lovely ham dinner which was yummy and had tasty potatoes in it. Then we had coffee and cake and tea and I opened pressies. I got this epic Gladiator book from my Dear friend Jimmy (which I am so essited about!!!) and I got lots of nice chocolate and epic little coffees (AND FLAVORINGS!!) and I got these adorable tights that look like something you'd find on Amy Pond. All blue and soft and Doctor Who-y.

They're Doctor Who tights okay? 

I'm wearing them now

I love them. 

Then I watched Maze Runner for the third time. It's just as brilliant as always. I love that movie. So much. I mean.... Thomas 8-) The thing still hurts of course. It hurts a lot. OH AND NOW I HAVE TONS OF NEWT FEELS TOO I WAS NOT A HAPPY PERSON.

We played this weird game. You had to do things like sit on shoes and talk about yourself in the third person and play pick a boo with people who called you by name. 

It was a good birthday.

UPDATE OF THE WEEK!!!!!!!!

I'm taking an Acting For the Camera class. 

One minute I'm like....

YAY ACTING

The next minute I'm like...

MY TEACHER IS TERRIFYING

The Acting Teacher is a little intense. And she kind of freaks me out. but I love acting and the Community College is the only place in town that I can act so I have to take her with the acting. She's a very nice person. She is just kind of an ACTING MUST BE YOUR LIFE teacher. And she doesn't give you much breathing room. You either SWIM or you SINK and there is no in between. Acting is big and intense. You had better want it, dang it!!!! YOU BLEED OR YOU LEAVE.

Yes I used this gif just for Newt. Don't judge me.

I've also been making epic videos in my new video maker and feeling excited cause you can sharpen it and brighten it and slash it and change its color and add dialogue at several points and add granite and dust and scratchy lines so it looks like an old movie and it looks SO. PERTY. I have to be careful how much time I spend on it cause I'm just SNIP - ADD VIDEO - SNIP - BRIGHTEN VIDEO....

VIDEO MAKING IS EPICNESS

I opened up Splintered Courage again and I am EDITING. (laughs crazily) I'm finishing Broken Turst also, and I have one chapter left in the Conspiracy of Thrones. It should be finished by the end of the week. I know of some people who want to read it and I'm thinking of maybe doing an auction? I don't know, I will have to see. Maybe I should try sending my books into publishers too cause I've been told they're good. Just as soon as I finish twelfth grade and past this terrifying acting class and read the six or eight books lying neglected at the bottom of my bed....

CAUSE WE'RE YOUNG AND WE'RE RECKLESS....!!!

I've started Watching Flashpoint.

GREG!!!!!!!

EDDIE!!!!!!

JULES!!!!!!

SAM!!!!!!!

SPIKE!!!!!

WORDY!!!

LOU!!!!!!!

..........

he needs more explanation points. 

LOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This show is so good on so many levels. You cry a lot but usually its not a BAD crying. The team is just so brave and kind and wonderful and what they do is so amazing and emotional you can't help but cry. It's about this... SRU Unit which is a handpicked team of elite cops that are different from any other SWAT team out there. They take on situations that have reached their peak and go in with the incentive to 'Connect. Respect. Protect." They want to help the people who are in trouble, and that includes the prosecutor. They want to talk down the Prosecutor, not kill him. They don't go lethal until absolutely necessary. They're awesome. Sometimes the stories can be really sad. Sometimes they can be really painful. But they always end hopeful. There are only a couple that are legitimately depressing, and with those you have to watch the next one to feel better. But most of the time it just gives you hope and emotional crying. It's really good. And its really clean. Super clean. The worst they get is this one kissing scene that is kind of long, but nothing happens. Its squeaky clean.

EPIC FAMILY FEELS

EPIC TEAM FEELS

EPIC BRO FEELS

EPIC BRO/SIS FEELS

EPIC OTP FEELS

SAD FEELS

BROKEN FEELS

SWEET HAPPY FEELS.

THIS IS SO GOOD! *sobs* SO SO GOOD

I love Flashpoint. As you can see.

See this post? this is why I should post more than once a week. I'm just like "HI!!! *DUMPS A BUNCH OF RANDOMNESS ON YOU* BYEEEEE!

I have a book to read and tea to drink and a cold to sooth. I also have to watch SHIELD later.

Shield.... *headdesk* Yeah that is stressing me out. So is Grimm. And I'm mad at Doctor Who. And Supernatural. (THAT SHOW IS SO DUMB) And The-One-I-Only-Watch-For-Stiles is on hiatus.

 Remind me not to watch so many shows at once. It can't be good for me.

But whatever I love them.

Watch Flashpoint.

PEACE OUT Y'ALL!!!!!!

*slides off car*

Bella

I haven't given up and that is all that matters

Update of the day?

I am still writing!

I know right?? Go me!!

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Well actually that is a pretty big thing. Me writing I mean. I almost gave up last week. Its been hard to write lately because I am trying to finish school so I haven't been doing as much writing as I could be and I depressed myself because I realized I have only written like, 2000 words in the past three days. I'm also coming up on a hard part in my story and I'm afraid because I have to start plotting part two and part two is going to be sad, and overall I'm just not doing so well right now. BUT I'M NOT GIVING UP!!!!! I am a warrior!!!!! I can't give up now! Not when I have a buddy who pokes me to make sure I don't lose steam.

She is a very good buddy.




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My Motto. 

Anyway, as far as my story is going I think I'm doing pretty well. I mean, considering. The plot escalated so quickly I almost couldn't keep up with it and now it is so dark and awful and I realized I needed to do things I didn't want to do. I have to hurt characters and create pain and I just... I just didn't want to write. Because I know the more I wrote the closer I'd be to all that bad stuff and I didn't want to have to write it. Cause I know it will hurt.

 

Today I worked on the end of my story. I have three other bits I need to write in, all of which I am having trouble with. I need to write an escape, a betrayal and another bit that I can't actually talk about but lets just say it is hard to do. Suffice to say I was too upset to write those and decided to finish up my ending instead. This was a big step because I've been postponing that last scene for a while and I knew it was 'Now or never.'  So I wrote it. I have my last scene done now, and it was really, really hard to write and I was so distraught I had to make something to cheer myself up. Here you are. A snippet, a sneak peak. Something like that. I don't even know what to call it.

you're welcome.

 

You are free to guess who that is, who that particular quote belongs to.

 

 

I want to try and audition for a "My Fair Lady" play but I am very nervous and I'll need to eat lots of ice cream and think it over before deciding. I'm also going to start looking into getting an agent. To help with my acting. Until then I need to see if there is a way I can start making some money. This job thing I have, I dunno if its gonna work out. It doesn't look very good right now.

 

I am want a new blog look. I've wanted one since, like, January. I feel like my blog is really crowded. And green. And I'm just done with it. Maybe I'll play around with blogger when I have time. See if I can tweak a few things. Make it look nice again. Clean it up a little.

 

Okay I'm ready for Summer now. I want my sun, I want my seventy-degree weather and I want to sit on the deck and have the wind be chilly and drive me inside cause I don't want to wear a sweater. In JUNE. The magic of living on the mountains guys.

 

We watched The Winter Soldier again on Sunday. We went down to the at the dollar theatre after Mass and made an event of it, getting coffee and banana bread and preparing for the emotional trauma we were about to suffer. Again. Tell you what, it was worse the second time. I really need a third one. and the next Avenger movie. 2016 is so far away!

 

God Bless and have a lovely night! Peace out y'all!

 

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Bella

  

 



"I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear."

 

Sometimes I feel like Shawn when I talk about my acting. Then I wonder how crazy my friends must think I am. And then I wonder how crazy I am.

Crazy.

I'm a bit depressed because tonight there were auditions for The Man of La Mancha and .... I didn't go. I missed it.

There were a few reasons. One, I was sick for most of January and was unable to sing till about last week. I had little, to no preparation leading up to auditions. And then I just.... didn't. I kind of freaked myself out, because I got this terrifying image of myself auditioning without preparation.

Gus

And I was like, Nope! that's not happening! I swear next time I'll prepare and be brave and audition, but auditioning in the Spur-of-the-moment seemed like a really bad idea.

And now I've run out of excuses and I feel even sadder. I SHOULD HAVE AUDITIONED!!!!!

Oh well, its too late now.

On the upside we have snow in our backyard again. I will admit I missed the snow. We've only had two storms all year. Its been cold and windy and cloudy, but we haven't had much snow at all. And aside from the fact that our town need the snow for business, I like looking out and seeing white tipped trees and snowy houses, not just mud and dead trees. I hate that.

I knew the warm-spell would never last. Its funny how the people in Tahoe react if we go more than a few months without snow. We're in sever DROUGHT! It will never snow AGAIN!!! They never seem to remember this happens regularly; we'll have a few hard winters in a row and few easy winters in a row. And there are always warm spells. As in 65 degrees in February. I'm pretty sure we're okay. and sure enough we've gotten our snowflakes back. The Ski Slopes are very pleased.

psych

 

Something else pretty nifty happened. I know this family that owns a paddle shop in town, and just a couple days ago their father asked me how I'd feel having a summer job working the Paddle shop. I was taken a bit by surprise, so I didn't answer straight away. He interrupted my stunned silence and told me to think about it, I had months. So I did. And I plan to take him up on his offer. Its a good paying job, it would help me save up for acting and it would make me feel good about myself.

 

You know what? Thinking about this makes me feel jittery. Now I need tea to settle my nerves. Speaking of tea, have any of you have seen The Time of The Doctor? If not, careful as you read, I may have a few spoilers here..... -

 

 I have very mixed feeling about it. I want to watch it again and see if its better the second time around when you know what to expect and are prepared for it.  Honestly, I was expecting a lot worse. I sort of thought the Doctor was going to get trapped on Trenzalore and forced to finally battle the Silence. I was expecting this huge, epic, traumatizing and brutal episode with sobbing and screaming and moments of insane denial. What I got wasn't that. The Doctor and Clara were both brilliant and I loved it whenever they were together, they were amazing. But the episode it self left me feeling rather let down and disappointed. The Disclaimer here is that while we were watching it did keep glitching and freezing and there were a lot of people watching it, so there was a bit of shuffling going on, making it distracting to watch. But that aside, I went through that episode not sure what was going on or why. It felt like nothing happened for Fifty minutes, The Doctor changed and you were done.

 

I'm not saying it was all bad or anything. There were a bunch of small, sweet moments and the episode carried a lot of potential, but it wasn't built on enough. The 'villains' of the story were almost non-existent. There was altogether too little of the Doctor, and Silence NEVER FELL! That was upsetting because we've been having the climax of the Silence since his first episode. But the Silence were barely there. It was anit-climatic. The episode felt weak and without much of a point or plot, at least to me. Matt deserved a better than that. He was a fantastic Doctor and he deserved a proper, fantastic send off. His last scene on the TARDIS was very sad, though, I will give the episode that. His last moments were brilliant and emotional and I cried. Of course I cried. The Doctor was changing, he was leaving and I had to watch it happen, and it was upsetting. I found myself hysterical and giddy upon finishing the episode, which means it hurt me more than I thought it was while watching it. So that was all good. But.... Matt deserved better!

 

And that's all. I'm tired now. Its late, and getting late means I'll start to ramble and that is no good. So its better for all of us if I just go now. Cheerio Mates!!

 

 

 

Geronimo!!!

Having a wonderful time, wish you were here.

Sam Winchester

As I sit in my room, wearing my brown hoodie and sipping hot tea, I think back on my last week and wonder what about it was so awesomely EPIC that I could share it with the rest of the world.

The truth is, I have nothing.

Zero.
Ziltch
Notta.

I've just been sick and sad and sniffly. Except today. Today was nice because I got up and actually felt human again, and I was able to get dressed and eat breakfast like a normal person and not a zombie. I felt so lovely I flipped on Imagine Dragons and sang along while washin' up breakfast dishes - WHOA-O-O-O, WHOA-O-O-O-O, I'M RADIOACTIVE - RADIOACTIVE!!! I was seriously the only semi-healthy person left in my house, except for one sister. And she left me alone because she had work.

Too bad. We could have had so much fun. The only down-side to being sort-of-well again was that I had to do all the chores. But that was okay, I'd trade chores for sickness any day. Its the best day I've had since forever, it seems. I even went to the Library and checked out The Thief because I was never able to finish it when it first took its tour around the house. I'm loving it, and nothing devastating has happened just yet which is a good change. And now I've probably jinxed myself. Gen is gonna die. Or get mortally wounded. Or die. Or disappear. Or have something terrible happen to him. Or die. Or worse.

Gwen

Please don't let him die!!! **Headdesk**

I haven't written anything in my story all week. This makes me very sad and downcast - I'm still stuck at 6,000+ words or something like that. Maybe 6080. I'm feeling a bit stuck, but that happens a lot. I can do this, I'm a writer!! *crazed laughter* Seriously though. I am a bit stuck. All of you repeat after me.

I will not kill the character I am fond of even if he wishes to die heroically.

That's good. good for the soul. I'll do my best, though he's making it hard. He's too amazing when it comes to this type of thing. Why do characters become so amazing? I don't know. All I know is I wish they wouldn't. This is why its so hard for me to write. I create a world in my head, I create people and a story and a life and then I have to start scribbling on paper (Or a keypad) and I have to fill out, and touch up blanks, and sometimes the lives I create run off on their own and I don't have much control and I find myself doing terrible things to this world I created.

Then I cry, because how could I be so evil and terrible? Its the reason I prefer acting. See, I love telling stories. My problem is creating the story and making it work. To step into someone else's world, to become one of their characters and tell a story through your actions and your words, that is so much better than trying to spill your ideas out on paper. Because in acting you have a stage. You have a world you are in where you know every cranny, every ark. You know yourself, because you are a person created into this world, you have a role to play and you carry it out. Its safe. You aren't telling a story, you are the story. It isn't the same as being the overlord who tells the characters what to do and then they run away. Its hard, wanting something one way and getting it another. Its hard to write, and this story is going to be difficult to finish. I have too much I want to express and not enough words to use. Acting helps me express myself more, because I know all the words. and I can apply the emotion and make people understand the Created World and the people in it. I love being able to do that. For some reason with writing, its .... I dunno. Its a lot harder. I guess that's why its hard for me to consider myself a writer.

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Speaking of acting, the community college is going to put on a musical this Spring that actually sounds clean and fun and something I could act in. Its called Man of La Mancha. It sounds really fun and, as a bonus, my singing teacher is playing the lead role. And I love my singing teacher. and getting a chance to work with him would be amazing, he could teach me so much. People, I need you all to pray that, if I do audition, I get in. I'll probably try it out. please pray for me, it would really help. This is a .... a pretty big deal for me. I've been looking for something like this for a while, it would be lovely to be able to act and feel a part of something. Plus, I could actually act and not have a some sister come barging in and stare at me all like....

Donna Noble

 

Besides those things, my week has been pretty lay back. I did have a lovely Epiphany though. For those of you who don't know, Epiphany is the day the Wiseman found Our Lord and presented Him with gifts, twelve days after Christmas. (See, the 12 days of Christmas are AFTER Christmas not before. Do take note.) We have a very special tradition where we set aside a present or two on Christmas and don't open them until the Epiphany, so we kind of get a little Christmas after. It keeps the anticipation in the house and it makes the Days of Christmas very special for my family. The wiseman even come and leave a few extra things under the tree. Its all very awesome.

We have a luscious breakfast

 

We put in the Wiseman

 

And then we have our own, special little Christmas.

 

My gifties!!

 

The bowtie isn't actually an Epiphany gift but I wanted to show it off to all of you. Aren't they all so lovely?  Especially the Jamies Dodgers. I'm going to save them to have on hand when I watch Eleven regenerate; You know, something to console myself. I actually do want to watch that Christmas Special. Yes, its going to be heart-wrenching and sad and I'm going to sob and flail, but it also looks really good and as much as I hate to see Matt go, I am a bit excited for the Twelfth. I just wish we didn't have to say goodbye to the Eleventh to see him. Its going to be very hard goodbye.

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We finished off the evening with Despicable Me 2, and you guys, it was adorable! I really enjoyed it and it more than met my expectations. I really loved Lucy too, she is so cute and crazy - the type of best friend I would have. You should watch it. Really. Go watch it.

Despicable Me 2

 

minions

 

Lucy Wilde

 

Well, that's all for now! I'll probably be back soon with some sort of fun exciting thing that isn't so sad and sappy. Maybe by that time I'll be well again too. Until then!!--------

*KEVINLIVES!*

 

God Bless!

~Bella