Bring me thunder, bring me lightning, bring me all things that are frightening! Bring me monsters, I'll enjoy them, bring me phantoms I'll destroy them! BRING ME GIANTS!

You know how sometimes you hear music and it's nice and exciting and it makes you feel better? And then sometimes you hear music and it gets into your soul, and makes you feel stronger, and braver, and all freaking inspired? I love music like that.

James Barbour has a CD called "Bring Me Giants," which is one of the most epic, awe-inspiring masterpieces I have ever had the pleasure of listening to. It makes me feel like I can take on the world. RAWR! BRING ME GIANTS!! I AM DAVID!!! YAAAAAAAAAS!!!

This CD is incredible. It inspires me to write music. It really inspires my musicals, which is both exciting and stressful. 'Cause here is the thing. I really love writing lyrics and I really love writing musicals. But okay, I'm relying on my Middle-School-Music memory and that is hard. Also, how do you write music when you don't play multiple instruments or have immense understanding of music theory?? Let me tell you, there is nothing quite like having inspiration for music and lyrics and epic orchestras, and sitting there like, I DON'T KNOW MUSIC LIKE THAT! It's sad!

Oh, on top of that I'm trying to compose music using a Piano App on my phone.

You don't know the struggle unless you've tried this yourself.

Why are phones screens so small? For real. I sit there like, Plink- no - Plunk, Piiiing?... - that's not right - Pling, Plaaaiiiing - AHA! *furious scribbles cords A4 and D4 on sheet of paper* Right. PLOOOOooong. Pleeeeng. PLOOOOOooooooNK.... no - Pleeeeeeeeeeeenk.

The struggle is real. For once my fingers are too big! I can only play one note at a time.

What I really need is one of those big electrical piano keyboards. The ones that are all portable and stuff. And you can Plug In other instruments.

Like dis.

#ChristmasWishList

It's hard wanting to write music and hitting walls because you're not a musical genius. It's hard wanting to act and not being able to because you can't drive yet. It's hard to be artistic and have to work. 8-P I want to write, I want to act, I want to take music theory, I want to use my talents to spread some good, even if it's small. I really want to start practicing my clarinet again because I think that would help with making music. I would have done this already, but my sadly it's in storage and I haven't been able to dig it out of the garage yet. 8-(

With all of these dreams stretched out before me, I come to a big decision. If you could all pray for me it would be very helpful, because I'm really nervous about it.

I've decided to step out of my nanny job.

This was a hard decision for me, one that I've been considering it for some time. You know how sometimes you do something and it's just not quite a fit? Well, that's what happened. I love both my nieces tons and will miss them a lot, but I can feel that this isn't where I'm supposed to be. Joe and Jess have been very good to me and I've had a good sort of year... but I do think it's time for a change. There is so much I'm not able to do here. Joe's house is in this cul-de-sac thing, and all connections to town are off the freeway, which I hate. There is nowhere I can go within walking or riding distance. I still don't have my license. *growls* I've also been missing Mass a lot due to conflicting schedules and work hours and such, and that has been hard. There is also a lot of stuff I need to figure out and I think this is for the best. I've been praying a lot about this decision, and if some of you could pray for me as well I would be very grateful. 8-D I hope to come back here soon, since it has more opportunities for actors, but before I can do that I need to give myself a little room to breathe, take a step back, and say, What do you want, Bella?

I mean, I know I want to act - and I even found a good Community Theatre group down here, which I'd like to join as soon as possible. I want to audition for their Spring Show which is The Secret Garden. If I like it, I can think about moving back into this town, but doing so on my terms, and in the places I want to be.

Anyway, please pray about my dreams, please pray that I can pursue my acting, even if it's in a small way, and please pray that these changes are right. 8-)


I'm working on another blog post, so you should be hearing from me soon. I hope you all have a good weekend!

*swings around cape and leaps off stage*

Bella

In which I muse. (Hey. I'm trying.)

I bet you didn't think I would post today.

I almost didn't.

But I am.

Hai!

You may applaud me now.

How have you all been? I've been great! Well except for the getting sick and having a head-cold that keeps me feeling tired all day... yeah great! I am so excited! Summer is finally here and that means bare feet and reading and days by the lake and hikes and sitting in the shade with a notebook writing, writing, WRITING! I had a thought the other day. Kind of a thought that came to me around 3:20 A.M or so. When I was half-asleep and almost dreaming but not quite. My thought was this. What is I wrote a script over the summer?

The sane half of me yelled out in anguish but the actor side of me - the insane side of me - thought how cool would it be to write a musical?

I have been OBSESSED with musicals lately. Sometimes I get on these highs and all I want to do is listen to musicals. I think that is my favorite type of storytelling. I have always wanted to attempt writing a script, but I've never quite gotten up the courage to do so. However I have a sort of plot now and maybe I will try It. What could it hurt? I'll need help with the music writing itself though, and that is the down side.

I just really want to write a musical you guys!!!!!

In light of this idea, I want to try to start reading scripts too. I need to learn how they flow and (especially) how to break down characters. It is something that really excites me - learning about a character. I think I am a little odd though cause I don't do it the normal way. I just tackle the character head on and then start climbing up the learning peak and find out more and more what kind of person it is. I know I should take more time with character study of course - for an actress that is crucial - it just is something I don't do too much. It's a resolution. Hopefully I can live up to it.

But I know what you are thinking. You're wondering what else I have been up to during my (long?) absence. Well, I painted my room, which is nice because it has been the same color for a while now and it's fun to have a change every now and then. Tiny and I picked out this soft light purple and I love how it turned out. It made our whole room look warm and cozy with a touch of Spring to it. It also makes our room look a lot cleaner and I like that. We had to move around all the furniture and stuff so we took advantage of the situation and packaged up some of my sister's nick-knacks and books. I have to say the room looks much less cluttered now. I don't even know how there was that much in the room. It was shocking.

It was a lot of fun painting though. We listened to four musicals in a row one of the days and I was able to sing along with almost all of the songs - (With Phantom I can sing them ALL) That was a total blast! Musicals man. It's like I can't get enough of them right now. All of my younger sisters are starting to get a twitch because I have been listening to musicals not stop for about... two months. But I don't care because now I know almost all of Tale of Two Cities and I'm excited! I want to play in that musical. It is on of my dreams. That and being Christine. *that might actually be a possibility. 

I performed my second solo in singing class and got RAVE reviews. If Pandy will let me maybe I can sing The Climb on her channel. That would be kind of fun. I was happy. See, I had this awful head cold and for most the past few days I've been cracking every time I get too strong. So I was really afraid I'd crack during my performance. But I said a prayer and God was good to me. I did a brilliant job and it was crack free! I was even given compliments on my projection and emotion.

YOU DON'T KNOW HOW FUN IT IS TO BE COMPLIMENTED!

Besides those few things not much is going on. I am reading Brother's in Arms again and it hurts WAY worse this time because it's been picked to death and everything flows better and is tighter and just more full and brilliant and painful. Franz hurts! He hurt before but now he is even worse and I think he has made it to my top five favorite book characters ever! HE ISN'T A MONSTER HE IS A SAD DYSFUNCTIONAL PUPPY! I LOVE HIM.

Oh yeah, I'm also trying to finish up my LOTR review. I feel really bad that I haven't gotten that posted yet, but its a hard subject to approach. Because.... Lord of the Rings! I want to get it done soon though. It is almost finished.

Righto. I have a bed to climb into and music to listen to. PEACE OUT Y'ALL!

*swings around cape and leaps from stage.*

 

 

 

Bella

What next?

I totally singed my skin off the other night. that was dramatic. What I meant was, I dropped a bunch of boiling water and scorched a good six inches of my leg right on the side of my calf. It hurt. A lot. And now I have a massive red burn and this silly bandage that makes me feels heavy and slow. I can't run very well. And it keeps trying to scab so then I move and it cracks and I hobble. It's really annoying. I never realized how much I moved until suddenly I was falling over myself. More than usual, that is.

.

Now at least I know what it's like for my poor book characters.


Speaking of my characters, right now I am reading a book about Gladiators. I am hoping to write my own story in May sometime so I have to read as much as I can before then. I am really excited about my Gladiator book and I'll probably release the plot within a few days, maybe longer if I get super busy. But I'll try hard not to delay too long. I also have this plan. to start writing again and set aside time to read and all that stuff. Why is there no time to do anything anymore?

 I should be done with school in two weeks. Two. I am freaking out a little because finishing school means life-ing and I don't know if I am ready to Life. With that being said, I actually do have a plan for after I graduate. I am going to go to school for acting. I am going to try and get myself into one of those Group Theater people and go on Broadway. I just need a job. But I have an opportunity knocking right now, so please pray hard about that.

It's true.

Okay. I have posted.  And it's  probably the most boring post in history.

On the upside I'll be doing my Lord of the Rings post in just a bit! Stay tuned!

*slides off car* 

Bella

I attempt to Post.

I was going to post a poem today but I can't because I lost my notebook, and in consequence I've also lost my poem.

AGONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's been seven days since I last visited you so I'm just gonna dump a lot of stuff on random stuff. I have to warn you I am a little tired and weird tonight so my writing might not flow, but remember that I tried and that is what counts.

Happy .... First Sunday after Easter! It has been a crazy week! I've been writing a bit and setting the plot for my Gladiator book. I am editing Splintered Courage and I have found out a lot about The Conspiracy of Thrones so it is going to change quite a lot when I got back and fix it up. I think it is going to be quite a bit darker and more war-like.

Yay!!! lol.

I am reading Lord of the Rings and I plan to do THE POST about the Books VS Movies soon. Hopefully within a couple of weeks.  So that should be fun. I get to do lots of comparisons and parallels and contrasts and things like that. Are you excited?? I am. I have to say this time around the books are cracking me up. All the characters are so sassy and grouchy! Gimli is a drama queen and Legolas is bratty and pokes fun at people because he's an elf and no one else is an elf, and he can walk on snow and no one else can. *evil laugh*

Aragorn is obsessed with the Sword that was Broken. It is hilarious. I don't know how Tolkien pulled of some of the ridiculous stuff he did, because no one else could have written it and made it work. He is a genius.

I have also found out that May 25th is Geek Pride Day and I plan to celebrate the HECK out of that day. I'm gonna be geeky and unashamed. That's all I'm saying. I'll probably do a fun post to. Save the date! May the 25th!

I am taking singing classes which is a ton of fun. My singing teacher is this cute, short little man who is kind of dorky and ridiculous and he makes me laugh and I just love him. He is such a nice guy. I am trying to choose songs to sing, so I've been watching and listening to a lot of musicals, like The Phantom of the Opera and Jekyll and Hyde. 

I am still geeky about musicals. And they still make me emotional.

I am planning on watching the midnight showing of The Age of Ultron with my best friend. We will probably geek out and laugh and weep and do all those fabulous things. I am so excited! ... Well excited and scared.  (see what I did there?)

And that is about all that's been going on in my life. I have a musical to cry over. PEACE OUT Y'ALL!!

*jumps down rabbit hole*

I'm sick. And I didn't do my Tolkien post.

source

Last week was Tolkien week and I had every intention to write a whole post dedicated to Lord of the Rings and Tolkien in general. It was going to be glorious! Full of fangirl bliss!! Many gifs and feeeeeels!!! But now it's Tuesday. Tolkien week has slipped by and I did nothing. I suppose I do have an excuse. First, I got sick and I felt too tired and too cranky to write period. (not even in my stories) Second, I was trying to wait for the Tolkien Tag one of my sisters was working on. She didn't finish it in time and now I feel sad. I'm a terrible Tolkien-Girl. *hangs head* I still plan to do the Tolkien Tag once it is done but I really can't post tonight. I'm too tired and I feel funny and my head hurts.

I'm also suffering feels from several different books, one of which I've seen a spoiler to and now feel sick about finishing. It's going to hurt you guys. It's going to hurt bad.

OH AND I HATE ANTHONY HORWITZ. JUST FYI! HE HAS AN EVIL LITTLE MIND! Prepare yourselves, because I'm probably going to do a screaming post when I finish this series. I have a little more than two books left. There is so much pain to come. So. Much. Pain. I'm scared.

Why do I always get sick the minute I sign up for Singing class? Why can't it happen before or after? It's kind of hard to sing when you have a sore throat you guys. And I have a private lesson tomorrow. Yeah. *le sigh*

I'm actually excited, I love private lessons because I have the nicest singing teacher in the world, I swear. He is so sweet. And he is adorable and funny and he makes me laugh. He makes you WANT to sing, and somehow you don't feel afraid doing it for him: he's just so happy to see you. You don't want to disappoint him. I'm just sad I have to be sick for my first one. It makes me sad.


I''ll be back soon with a Tolkien Post! I swear!!! Until then - PEACE OUT Y'ALL!!

*slides off car*

Bella