Friday, May 20, 2016

Civil War Blog Catastro-Party - Day Five

I am so sorry my days aren't actually lining up. I had to help my brother finish moving out of his apartment, and blogging was put on the back burner. *sad face*

Thanks for hanging in there with me guys! I did say this Party would officially last till the end of May ... so if there are still people wanting to join, feel free!! You can even sneak into June if you ask very nicely 8-)

Day Five: FREE DAY!!!

Today I get to post about anything Civil War related that I want.

I decided to post to post a little bit about Tony Stark and his relationship with Steve.

Tony and Steve are basically polar opposites. Where Steve is humble and sincere, Tony is prideful and slap-dash. Where Steve tries to be open and honest with people, Tony aggressively hides all his true feelings under sarcasm and jokes. Where Steve takes things from a moral standpoint, Tony takes things at the necessity standpoint. Where Steve is old-fashion, Tony is all about improvement and change.

In fact, the only things that Tony and Steve actually agree on are:

A.) Saving and protecting people is extremely important

B.) You have to do the right thing, even when it's hard.

Even so, the characters have very different ways of going about these things.

Tony's protection is all about keeping chaos out and order in. He often confuses protection with restraint. He doesn't like people getting hurt, so he gets paranoid and over-reacts. I think if he had to he would lock people up to keep them safe, especially if he thought that was the only way to keep them safe. He will often jump to a course of action without thinking, and then regret it later. He wants to save people so badly. He wants to keep all the bad out of the world. No more death, no more war, just safety and harmony. I honestly think Tony tries too hard to protect everyone from everything.

"I see a suit of armor around the world."

Steve's protection is a little different from Tony's. Steve classifies safety and protection with freedom and loyalty. He fights so that people can be free from chains. He fights for the rights of civilians, he fights for justice and the right to choose your own fate. Where Tony sees armor, Steve sees prison bars, and I think that is their biggest difference. Steve faces everything on a very emotional, almost Christian level. (This would make sense, since we all know he at least believes in God.) His idea of safety isn't about law and restriction, it isn't even about gun power. It's about being that one voice that says "No," until hundreds of others join with you. Safety is about people feeling free and happy, safety is about knowing you have control. Steve wants to save people as much as Tony does, but Steve is more of a soldier then a saviour. He will protect people from harm, but he isn't going to violate their decisions, their beliefs, or their freedom. Where Steve pulls someone from the water, Tony would go one step father and buy a life jacket for that person to wear as long as needed. Where Steve would pull civilians from a town full of explosives, Tony would try and make them all leave for good.

"This isn't freedom. This is fear."

From the beginning, Tony and Steve didn't get along. Tony saw a man that was way too good to be true. Steve saw a man who didn't care about anything but fame. The two clashed instantly. They didn't like each other. If you've ever been around someone that is just so good it seems fake, then you have an idea of what Tony saw in Steve right at first. And if you've ever been stuck in a room with a man who thinks he is the bees knees, you know what Steve thought Tony was too. It was like trying to force day and night to co-exist when they only thing they have in common is a ball of light that hangs in their sky. Even the source of the light differs from one to the next!

I like how Tony and Steve have progressed. It took them some time, but they both realized that first impressions aren't always right impressions. Tony saw Steve take a risk and dig into SHIELD to confirm if Fury was really being upfront. He saw that Steve wasn't just a soldier blindly following orders, but a leader and a warrior, ready to color outside the lines if needed. That spark of rebellion was what made Tony see Steve in a different sort of light. He started to see the good man inside the perfect model, a man that kept getting more and more clear during the battle of New York. In like manner, the impact Colson's death had on Tony also changed what Steve thought of him too, as did his stunt with the nuclear warhead and the wormhole in space. He realized how brave Tony really was. He saw he had been wrong. Tony proved he was ready to die to save everyone. - "Big man in a suit of armor, take that away and what are you?..." - A hero. He was still a hero. Both Tony and Steve saw that at the end of the day they wanted the same thing; to protect people from harm. I think it was that battle in New York that gave them the bond that would grow as they continued to work together. The fought side by side in a battle for humanity. They had each other's backs, they put their lives on the line together, and in so doing, they gained a certain respect and admiration for each other.

"There are really only two relationship's in Tony's life in which he is willing to assume a lower status. One's with Pepper, obviously, equal footing, and the other is with Cap." - Robert Downey Jr.

I love how Marvel has built and built on Steve and Tony's friendship. In Age of Ultron, Tony's reason for creating Ultron to keep the world safe was because he saw a vision of all the avengers, his FRIENDS, dead. Dead because of him. And who is just conscious enough to ask why he didn't do more? Steve.

The Avengers died... and it was his fault. Steve died, and it was his fault. The world burned, and Captain America blamed him. The vision as a whole had a huge impact on Tony, but I think the fact that Steve was the one still awake, Steve was the one he had to watch die, says a lot about the impact Captain Rogers had had on his life. I mean, Steve is a war hero and a soldier. He is also a man willing to die to save Tony. That makes him a little like Yinsen. A lot of his traits are like Yinsen's too, now that I think about it....

Obviously Steve's opinion matters a lot to Tony, probably a lot more than Steve realizes. It's amazing that someone he was so against in The Avengers, is now someone he can't bear to lose. Steve has come to mean so much to him, that the idea of dissapointing him, of losing him, breaks him. It is a funny thing that two people who were so staunchly opposite, are now more like two sides of the same coin.

I don't want you gone.

The beauty of Tony and Steve's friendship is that it shouldn't work but it does. It also is a interesting fact that they were both very alone, yet somehow brought together through the Avengers and the need to keep people safe. The Avengers was a kind of safe haven for both of them. Steve, who was thrown into a new world he barely understood, finally had a reason for being alive, he suddenly had purpose. Tony, who had spent so much of his life alone, suddenly had people who would have his back and fight with him, and both of them needed the Avengers so badly.

I cannot express how important this brother story is. Tony, the modernist, the  man constantly pushing for the next big change, for improvement and evolution. Steve, who holds on to the old world, the old values, who thinks tradition has a very important place in society. Two men who have such clashing views, who gradually come to see each other's values and the heart behind the suit. They are so different and so similar. They are both reckless, they both hold themselves accountable for every accident that happens on their watch. They both want to help make the world a better place. They want to save people. They care so much, and they fight so hard. They will give up everything for the ones they love.

"For as long as I can remember I just wanted to do what was right."

"I just finally know what I have to do. And I know, in my heart ,that it's right."

This brings me to the issue of family, and what it means in Tony's life.

As far as I can tell, Tony is in fact, very lonely. As Yinsen said in the first Iron Man, "You are a man with everything and nothing." At the start he had no family and very few friends. He also appears to have trust issues and a serious problem opening up to people.


Let's do a quick study on Tony's relationships so far.

First, there were his parents. Tony obviously loved his Mom, but he and his Dad were not close, to say the least. He describes Howard as "Cold and distant," and apparently, Howard never even said "I love you." (I wish Marvel would explain what happened to Howard, cause that doesn't sound like the Howard that Steve knew...) He lost both parents in a devastating car accident, leaving him with a suitcase full of regret, especially because he hadn't reconciled with his dad.

After this, there were three people Tony relied on. Rhodey, Pepper and Obediah.

Obediah had him captured and tortured, and later betrayed him again. He almost got Pepper killed, and he darn near almost killed Tony as well. He lied and used Tony for years. He was his father-figure and he turned on him. He said that he hated Tony, Tony was a burden, Tony was worthless. Tony was forced to kill him.

Then we have Pepper. Pepper, who he loves more than anything else. Pepper, who has stuck with him through the thick and the thin, but now apparently is gone? They are taking a break?? WHAT? What happened??

Rhodey has been there for Tony, even when Tony didn't really deserve it. He did have a few times where he had to go behind Tony's back to do what he thought was right, like in the second Iron Man, but in the end he always ends up on his friend's side.

Finally, we have the Avengers. Tony has never had so many friends, and they were more than just friends. They were his family. He trusted all of them with his life, he built a home around them, he became the big brother they all needed. All he wanted to do was keep everyone safe, keep his family safe.  He feels responsible for them because he is the reason they are even a thing. That's why he was so desperate to keep the Avengers together in Civil War. He didn't want to lose his family, and he definitely didn't want to put his friendship with Steve at risk. They were the building blocks of the Avengers team, the brains and the glue. Without Steve the whole thing threatened to collapse.

"Sometimes I want to punch you in your perfect teeth. But I don't want you gone. We need you, Cap."

Tony wanted to fix the problem. Throughout CACW, he tried to call a truce several times, tried to get Cap to back down, tried to keep him and his friends out of prison. He seemed willing to compromise if Steve would just talk with him. And when Tony saw that he was wrong about Bucky, he sneaks out to help Steve and try, once again, to mend fences. He comes as a friend, waving a white flag.

Tony was even willing to give Bucky a chance... until he sees the horrific footage of the Winter Soldier brutally murdering his parents.

All this time Tony has thought Howard and Maria died in an accident. It is clear he has regret and grief over it, it is continually brought up through all the Iron Man films, and some of the Avenger films. Now he sees that it wasn't an accident. They were murdered. There was a reason Tony had lost them, and that reason was the Winter Soldier, standing just a few feet away. Further more, Steve had known and never said anything! All the grief, the rage, the regret, the pain, it just came blowing up inside of him. Imagine if you saw your parents killed by your friend's old war buddy?? I dare you to keep a cool head after you see your father's face bashed in and your mother choked where she sat! Tony lost control, he got emotional and he went after the target.

Steve was desperate to protect Bucky. He gets in Tony's way, and the two of them have a giant fight. They were both very emotionally vulnerable. Steve had only just got Bucky back. For him it was only a few years since Bucky and the train, and his grief, his pain, and his fear of losing his friend again, was still open and raw. Tony had just seen his parents killed in a horrible way, and his own grief and pain emerged with a vengeance. He had never really faced it, and now it suffocated him. He lashes out.

"He's my friend!"
"So Was I."

This line makes me so sad. The trailer made it look like Tony was hurt and he still wanted Steve for a friend, but Steve had turned his back on him. In reality, "So Was I" was like Tony cutting Steve off. It was a harsh past tense; "We were friends, and you stabbed me in the back!" It was harsh and vulnerable and full of anger. It wasn't regret, it wasn't Tony wanting to mend fences and Steve was too stubborn. It was Tony breaking the ties between them. It was so depressing!!! Steve Rogers, the man Tony had slowly opened up to and grown close to, the man who has put such a huge emphasis on honesty and sharing information with your friends, had lied to him. Tony felt horribly betrayed.

They fight, and the more Steve tries to stop Tony, the angrier and more hurt Tony gets. He tells Steve to stand down... but of course, he doesn't.

The fight escalates until Steve has the upper-hand and literally beats Tony into the ground,  then drives his shield in Tony's arc reactor, immobilizing him.  Steve then helps Bucky to his feet. As he turns to leave, Tony yells at him that he doesn't deserve his shield... and Steve drops it.  He carries Bucky away from danger, leaving Tony alone.

Once the dust settled, I think both Steve and Tony realized they had gone too far. Steve sends Tony and apology letter, and tells him if ever needs anything, Steve will be there for him. It doesn't fix everything, and it doesn't change that Tony still feels very hurt and betrayed, but I think it went a long way to helping Tony feel a little less lost. It was step one of building back what they had lost. It left the door open for healing and starting over, and I completely trust Marvel to fix them. They both care for each other very much. Neither of them actually wanted to fight. Both regret what happened. They are brothers, if rather broken, betrayed brothers, and I truly believe they can come back from this. Deep down, they are still friends, and that will never change. If Steve needed help, Tony would be there in an instance and vise versa. They were both idiots. They were both stupid. They were both right and wrong, and they both did things they shouldn't have.

They're friends who ended up on opposites sides of the war.

Ultimately they want the same thing. They just have very different ways of going about it.

I think Tony and Steve have a complicated and amazing relationship. I think they will eventually recover from what happened, and their friendship will emerge even stronger than before. They are meant to fight side by side, and in the end they will always end up together.

Steve and Tony are precious human being's that deserve all the happiness in the world. Pass it on.

*swings around cape and leaps off stage*



  1. Awww yis. This was a beautiful post. Now I'm sad because these two sad adorable little potatoes and their problems.

  2. I plan on reading all of your posts when the party is done! My day four post:

  3. Just wrote the last post!!!! :) Thanks for hosting this, it was so much fun. :D

  4. *just realising you were on Tony's side because my memory is rubbish apparently*



Oi, what are you.... Oh, you just want to comment? Then that's fine, please do! I love comments! but, um, I sort of stalk them.

Pile of good things

Pile of good things