Thursday, September 18, 2014

All that is gold does not glitter

I love the first days of autumn. I love how the wind picks up and the sky turns that dark velvet blue, growing deeper toward the horizon until it is almost violet it's so blue. I love how the trees are vibrant. They are turning colors but there is still a lot of green so it looks like the tree is on fire, alight with gold's and red's frozen into the perfect Kaleidoscope The sun seeps down through them and makes pools of shadows that play among the grass. And all the trees seem ten times more alive and the air is full of spice and the promise of snow. And it gets into your bones and makes you feel wild. You get struck with mountain fever and you want to run and dance with your hair down around your shoulders, and you want to find great boulders or massive hills of rock and stone and scale them. And rush down along side waterfalls. And tackle trees and climb to the top and just sit there and shout into the wind until you are hoarse and breathless.

That is what happened to me yesterday. Fall is coming and that means everything is starting it's change. I would be lying if I said I wasn't sad; I am. I love my summers and we don't have very long with them. But these past few years we've had precious poor winters and I'm actually kind of excited for cool weather. (haha. I bet that will change by January 8-D ) I sort of ditched everything: writing, reading I even stopped school early, and took off to the meadow with my little sisters. We spent more than two hours there, running up and down through the grass and letting the wild get into our blood until we were too winded and giddy to go on. and then I found what I really needed. A tree. I used to climb trees all the time when I was younger but in the past few years all my regular climbing trees have been systematically chopped down. (which is very sad for me.) So it's been like.... three years since I last climbed a tree. But when I saw this one I just HAD to get up among it's branches. So I did. And it was AMAZING. I forgot how much fun climbing a tree was!!! I got all scraped and my hand's stuck with pitch and bark but it was totally worth it. I felt like I was ten again. We got high enough that every time the wind blew the whole tree would rock and sometimes a great gale would toss up and it was so much fun! It was just what I needed. I've been rather stressed lately and getting to run and climb did a lot to relax me. It even helped with my writers block!

I've been having a really bad case of writers block. And it's frustrating because It isn't plot trouble or character trouble or 'how do I get them out of here now??' trouble. I knew exactly what I needed and I knew what I want. I have nothing wrong with the story itself, I can see the whole of it in my head. I just sit down to write and .... the scenes just don't. At all. They feel wrong and flat and awful and I can't make them flow or seem real and then I get mad and slam stuff around. I can see the scenes. I can act the scenes. I cant' write the scenes. This is very vexing for me.

After I climbed the tree and spent a day out I decided I had a plan. I would put Broken Trust on the table for a little and work on something else. This is terrifying for me; I have a fear of never finishing something if I stop. But I think a break from the story would help. I've been working with these same characters since May. Roughly. I was working out plots and story lines back in February and March, and that is just about seven months. I think I just need to step back for a little and hopefully I'll feel better when I open the Words Document again. Because as of right now I hate the whole book. I've started work on a sister story though! A real sister story!!! I'm excited I think it will be good. It is going to be a very fairytale-based story, with withes and wolves and cottages-in-woods and lots of dark bits. It should be fun 8-)

I had a moment the other day. I don't know if it is a nerd moment or a geek moment or a mixture of both, but it was a moment. My mom was chopping potatoes and humming the song of Gil Galad, from The Lord of the Rings, and then she muttered to herself; "Not all who wander are lost.... how does that go?" and I just spilled it off for her.
"All that is gold does not glitter.
Not all those who wander are lost
The old that is strong does not wither
Deep roots are not reached by frost
For from the ashes a fire shall be woken
A light from the shadows shall spring
Renewed shall be the blade that was broken
The crownless again shall be king."

And she just looked at me and laughed and I laughed too because I had no idea I knew that poem. I don't remember ever memorizing it. I just knew it, like knowing two plus two is four. It was weird.

And that was really random.

You know what else is weird? I am planning to write a book. A book about two Gladiators in Ancient Rome. It is going to be a friendship story and (if I do it right) it should be really, really good.  But I want to make sure to do it as well and as accurately as I can, so I threw myself into the research with great enthusiasm. I've always found Gladiators interesting. I'm not exactly sure why - I'm not even sure when I first hear about them. but I had an odd fascination with them. Researching them has only sparked my fascination more. I know they were awful. I know the idea of two warriors fighting to the death in a ring is terrible and, to be honest, I really don't get why Romans enjoyed it so much. It was brutal and horrific and I certainly would never go to see something like that. But it's not so much the games and the fights that intrigue me: it's the warriors themselves. Who were they? How did they train? Where did they come from? What was it about them that made them stick out so epically in history? I guess you could say it was my nerd coming out, or maybe my curiosity at why these gladiators were never mentioned in any history book that I've ever read. But either way it's an odd thing to be getting excited and even *cough* fangirly about. However to be fair, a lot of the fangirling is due to my story and the friendship I'm going to be writing, not the blood and gore and horror of the gladiators and their schools. So it isn't so weird. Still pretty weird though. Fangirling over my own books? Really? 

As you may have noticed I haven't changed my blog, nor have I done a Prison Break review. I do still plan to do both these things, but it is hard because now I am the oldest person at home and I am doing school and helping teach and making meals and I don't have a much time. I hope I can soon though, because I REALLY want to fangirl about Prison Break. But not yet. not yet.

TILL NEXT TIME!!! Peace Out Y'all!!


*slides off car*

1 comment:

  1. As the weather has gotten cooler here, as well, Molly and I have spent close to every single day at a park near us just sitting or exploring. It's insane how therapeutic fresh air can be. For the beginning and a lot of this summer I was outside every free moment. Even when I was writing and such I took my computer to our back porch. Then it got super hot and I had to stay in and I was getting soooo stressed out. It was crazy! And now that I can go out again I just feel so much better. I find it fascinating! Climbing trees are so fun. Unfortunately we don't have any near us that I know of which can be climbed. I'm on the look-out though. :-/

    Eeehehe!!! crazy Uther guy from Doctor Who. That made me laugh. XD And that is so strange. I had to put aside my current book, too. I wasn't getting anywhere and I had no desire whatsoever to do anything with it. I understand the fear of never finishing. I have the same thoughts with mine. Still, I'm hoping this new book will help clear my mind of the other and then when I need a break with this, my other one will be waiting happily (more like throwing rocks at me to get my attention....)

    I feel bad for not having read your book yet but things are chilling out. As soon as I convince my mom to let me print the document I'm gonna do so and enjoy it. :) Aaaand that's all. Byyyyyye!!!



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