Saturday, May 24, 2014

Seven Lies about Writing


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So you are writing a story? What is that like??
 
 
Its a bloody pain.
 
There are many pre-conceived idea's about how writing works. In this month (and in my time as a writer) I have heard many things that are ridiculous and make me laugh. Last night I heard the most ridiculous one ever, and decided I needed to vent. So I have made a list of the top Seven Lies about writing. Enjoy.

1.) "Writing isn't hard. All you do is put a string of scenes together. I could do it in a day."

This person has obviously never written. Ever. Writing is hard. Writing is a struggle. Sitting down and putting a story on paper isn't easy and it isn't always fun. Sometimes the only thing you want to do is throw down the book and run away and never open it again. Writing is NOT easy.


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2.) Writers block isn't real. You're just get lazy and stop caring. 
 
Take it from me you guys. WRITERS BLOCK IS VERY REAL!!!! IF you think it isn't you can go sit in a corner with Cas and Ward and drink their tea. It is true that sometimes you get burnt out. You don't want to write anymore. You get tired and you're not sure where you were going with the story. Sometimes lack of interest happens. Sometimes Pinterest happens. But sometimes you simply get to a part in your story and you can NOT make it move forward. You've dug yourself into a grave and now you don't know how to get out of it. (Or one of your characters have dug themselves into a grave. That happens.) Sometimes there is a forest you can't get out of or a dungeon one of your characters got himself trapped in when he thought he was being clever. Sometimes its an unexpected traitor. Sometimes all your characters start arguing and decide your plot is rubbish and they want to change it. So don't you dare tell me writers block isn't real.
 
 
3.) If you write you are a freaked out introvert with no life.
 
Okay. This is true to a certain extent. A lot of writers are more public-shy then normal people are. We prefer the comfort of our bedrooms and characters than being out all night with strangers. There is nothing wrong with that. But .... I'm a writer. And I am not an introvert. I get nervous. Sometimes I don't particularly LIKE being out of my comfort zone. But for the most part I enjoy people. I enjoy going out. I just like being home by a certain time. By 8:00 I want to be home. In my pajama's. And I want tea and cookies and pinterest.
 
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4.) Writers do nothing all day.
 
Excuse me. WHAT? This is as preposterous as "Homeschoolers never do school." Just because we aren't running around in big PROFESSIONAL jobs, doesn't mean we aren't doing anything. You have no idea how much work it is to pour your soul into a story. It takes lots of time. It takes energy. It takes long nights with chocolate,  pulling out your hair and begging your characters to behave. It takes research. It takes racking your brains until you can't remember what 2 + 2 equals and you forget you've already written this sentence.
 

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5.) Writers do not actually get bossed around by their characters. They make that up as an excuse to slack on writing.
 
I am going to write you into my book, my good fellow. And you are going to die. We do so get bossed around by our characters! If you haven't had characters poking you in your sleep you haven't properly written yet. If you haven't gotten distracted writing an essay or trying to fold laundry because one particularly annoying character will NOT SHUT UP, you either have very well-behaved characters or you just.... don't have characters period. 
6.)  Writers like causing their characters pain.
 
This isn't true. We don't like causing our characters pain. At least I don't. Nothing makes me more upset than having to watch my character go through a bunch of crap because of me. Nothing is harder for me than watching my characters cry or lose someone close to them. When they are hurt I am hurt. It is shocking how much you can be hurt by the characters you created. You are very close to them and therefore you feel what they feel. Its like watching a friend suffer. I am not even kidding. I have cried with my characters before! A couple times now. I Think the only people who like hurting their characters are Moffat and the SPN writers. Because they are EVIL.  
7.) 'Its your story. You can do what you want.'
 
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This was presented to me a few nights ago when I was writing a sad part in my book and having trouble with it.  I was getting super upset and kept having to stop to take a deep breath so I wouldn't cry. My mom noticed and asked me why I was doing what I was doing. And I told her I had to. The characters had given me no choice. She told me if it was upsetting to just change it, and I told her it had to happen and I couldn't change it. She laughed at that and said "Sure you can change it, Its your story, You can do what you want."
 
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You are adorable. I think I'm going to crawl into a corner and cry.
 
I think my fellow writers can agree with me that we do not always have control over our stories or what are characters do. Sometimes they think they are better than us and laugh at our ideas. They run off and do their own things and get themselves in trouble. Then the whine at you to get them out of it, even though you have no idea how. If you think we always have the ropes you are very, very wrong. And my buddy Jim can vouch for me on this. Characters have a mind of their own, I swear.  
 
 Do you think I'm right?
 
Onward!!! Snippet time!!!!!
 
You don't know how hard it is taking something out of my book that isn't a spoiler. But I tried. I tried really hard. So.... here. I tried to find a good one that wasn't too hugely spoiler-full.
 
Tyson and Michael didnt stop running until the camp was out of sight. The whole time all Michael wanted to do was turn around and run back. He felt like a coward, running from danger while his friends suffered. Tyson was slowing down, but instead of stopping he took a left and started running up the side of the mountain they had come down the night before. Michael ran along beside him, running pains shooting across his sides, his breath catching in his throat. I hate adventures he thought savagely to himself, all one ever does is run until they drop and then they get up and do it again the moment they have breath enough. It is the worst! He was also wondering why Tyson had decided to run back up the mountain when it had taken so long to get down it in the first place. But Tyson wasnt so much running up as he was running across. They were getting close to the river now, and Tyson changed his course slightly so they would come out just left of the riverbed. His breath was coming out stilted now too, and Michael knew he wasnt the only one running out of energy. Also, now that the adrenalin was beginning to fade, he was starting to feel the loss of sleep and he was slowing down. The river came into view in front of them and Tyson slowed to a stop. He stood for a moment, catching his breath. Michael stumbled up next to him. What now? he panted. Tyson chewed his lip then looked at Michael. Michael didnt like that look. He straightened up, feeling panicked all over again. Tyson, what is it? Who were they? They werent Wardens. That symbol... his words faltered and his panic rose. Tyson, who were they? Do you know them?
I know of them. said Tyson. Theyre called the Quad. They are the law and order of Algorome, and they answer to King John or Jonathan, as he is more properly called. They are like Wardens, only worse. He rubbed his knuckles as he spoke, and that made Michael nervous. How much worse?
Imagine the worst Warden you could possibly think of and then multiply that by as much ruthlessness and disrespect as you can and that is a Quad.
What will they do to the others? asked Michael. Why do they want them?
Tyson raised an eyebrow. Are you an idiot, or have you forgotten, there is a price on your bloody head! There is a price on all your heads! Even without that incentive, we were trespassing and sneaking about in Mighty Johns lands. Were forfeit to his kingdom and his laws. He glared up at the sky, which was quickly filling with dark storm clouds . Why do I always end up in situations like these? he asked, to no one in particular.
So, what? Theyll be taken back to Evinian? Tyson, they cant be! Dimitri and Nightly- they will be killed if theyre found! Peregrine is just a runaway, a rebel. He has a chance. Nightly and Dimitri, they dont. Theyll be hung for treachery!
Yes, I know Michael! No need to repeat the facts to me! Shut up, Im trying to think. Michael feel silent as Tyson paced up and down, fuming and cursing under his breath. He swung his dagger round and round in frustration, throwing it down into the dirt, then retrieving it and fiddling with it again. He muttered. He growled and glared and made some unkind remarks about nobles and their problems. Then finally he stood up.
Alright, listen. Remember how I said Id been to Algarome before? Well, I wasnt completely truthful with you. It wasnt just a visit. I was imprisoned here for a time; no. Dont ask why. Listen! I was able to break out and I think, I think if we are very clever we can break in the same way.
How?
Tyson grinned in bemusement. Every castle has a back door. He said. You just need to know how to open it.
 

You likey? I know it needs a bit of a polish but I think its pretty good. And its a lead-up to one of my favorite moments. Like, FAVORITE moments. I feel proud of myself, because I've been doing NaNo a little over two weeks now, and I have written thirty thousand words. That's pretty good right??
 
 I wonder how  many I will have by June 7th.
 
A quit word before I go. I had an interview today. I think I'm going to get a job. Its a nice job at a mall little sandwich shop. Please pray that I get it. I could really use some money.
 
That's all peasants! Enjoy you're crown!!! *Slides of Car*
 
 
 
~Ben The Robot~

10 comments:

  1. YOU ARE SO RIGHT ABOUT THAT LIST. Ahhhh. *bangs head against wall* I wish people wouldn't make statements like that. It's like the assume stuff based on stereotypes and it's so so so hard to convince them otherwise.
    I luuuurve that line of "every castle has a back door". GO YOU AND YOUR WRITING. XD

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    1. You really like it?? That's nice to know. Thank you sooo much for that :) I KNOW!! People are so dumb!

      ..... how are your feels there, Cait?

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  2. Hear hear, sister!! And I agree, those who use people to put in their book and kill them off are evil!

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    1. I don't like writers who wont stop hurting their characters :( how can they ever be so mean??? I don't know how Moffat does it so often

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  3. Is your book all paperbacky? Sammy and Clara and I want to read it all the way through. Can we make Jack buy it for us somewhere? Is there a hedgehog in it? (Sammy wants to know if there is a moose.)

    We will call you Berra then, because we are your very very good friends. We like you lots even if Jack doesn't share the computer so we can tell you.

    I write too, but I don't think I write lots like you because I don't have writing problems like you. I just read and watch things, and go on adventures and try and tell Jack cookies are good for me.

    I miss you. Can I come to Disney Land with everyone when it is the summer after this one? Then I can see you again.

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    1. Hallo John :) :) :) See me smile???

      It is nice. I have nick-names now. Real nicknames. I've only ever been Bella, except when my Mom would call me Fud. (and that is a very long story) so its nice to be Berra and Ben. I really like being Ben. It makes me feel so special.

      I will be sure you get to read my book when it is finished. Unfortunately, there is no moose in it. No moose at all. But now you have given me an idea for my other story, so thank you :)

      And I would LOVE for you to come to Disneyland. I miss both of you too. And I miss my Buddy Jim. I hate living so far away.

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  4. I definitely agree with you for number 7! I mean REALLY. And number 2. Like seriously. I think most of the time we think we have writer's block we *are* just being lazy ..... but it definitely exists. Definitely definitely. As for liking to cause characters pain .... no, maybe not, but liking to cause READERS pain? Definitely. Mwahahahaha!

    Great post, Bella! :)

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    1. causing readers pain... lol. that is true though. it is kind of fun watching readers cry. *evil laugh*

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  5. I can never rant enough about your book. It keeps giving me feels. Like, Bucky level feels. I wantsssssssssssssss your book

    I forgot if you are the jerk or the punk. I think the punk.....so

    Punk

    Jim the Space Adventurer

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    1. I think I am the Punk. So you say Punk and I say Jerk. I think... I THINK you did it right.8D

      ... it gave you feels? That just... thank you. That is so sweet. It makes me feel like a REAL writer. And it makes me happy that just my snippet are giving you emotions.

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Oi, what are you.... Oh, you just want to comment? Then that's fine, please do! I love comments! but, um, I sort of stalk them.

Pile of good things

Pile of good things