Thursday, January 9, 2014

Having a wonderful time, wish you were here.

Sam Winchester

As I sit in my room, wearing my brown hoodie and sipping hot tea, I think back on my last week and wonder what about it was so awesomely EPIC that I could share it with the rest of the world.

The truth is, I have nothing.

Zero.
Ziltch
Notta.

I've just been sick and sad and sniffly. Except today. Today was nice because I got up and actually felt human again, and I was able to get dressed and eat breakfast like a normal person and not a zombie. I felt so lovely I flipped on Imagine Dragons and sang along while washin' up breakfast dishes - WHOA-O-O-O, WHOA-O-O-O-O, I'M RADIOACTIVE - RADIOACTIVE!!! I was seriously the only semi-healthy person left in my house, except for one sister. And she left me alone because she had work.

Too bad. We could have had so much fun. The only down-side to being sort-of-well again was that I had to do all the chores. But that was okay, I'd trade chores for sickness any day. Its the best day I've had since forever, it seems. I even went to the Library and checked out The Thief because I was never able to finish it when it first took its tour around the house. I'm loving it, and nothing devastating has happened just yet which is a good change. And now I've probably jinxed myself. Gen is gonna die. Or get mortally wounded. Or die. Or disappear. Or have something terrible happen to him. Or die. Or worse.
Gwen

Please don't let him die!!! **Headdesk**

I haven't written anything in my story all week. This makes me very sad and downcast - I'm still stuck at 6,000+ words or something like that. Maybe 6080. I'm feeling a bit stuck, but that happens a lot. I can do this, I'm a writer!! *crazed laughter* Seriously though. I am a bit stuck. All of you repeat after me.

I will not kill the character I am fond of even if he wishes to die heroically.

That's good. good for the soul. I'll do my best, though he's making it hard. He's too amazing when it comes to this type of thing. Why do characters become so amazing? I don't know. All I know is I wish they wouldn't. This is why its so hard for me to write. I create a world in my head, I create people and a story and a life and then I have to start scribbling on paper (Or a keypad) and I have to fill out, and touch up blanks, and sometimes the lives I create run off on their own and I don't have much control and I find myself doing terrible things to this world I created.

Then I cry, because how could I be so evil and terrible? Its the reason I prefer acting. See, I love telling stories. My problem is creating the story and making it work. To step into someone else's world, to become one of their characters and tell a story through your actions and your words, that is so much better than trying to spill your ideas out on paper. Because in acting you have a stage. You have a world you are in where you know every cranny, every ark. You know yourself, because you are a person created into this world, you have a role to play and you carry it out. Its safe. You aren't telling a story, you are the story. It isn't the same as being the overlord who tells the characters what to do and then they run away. Its hard, wanting something one way and getting it another. Its hard to write, and this story is going to be difficult to finish. I have too much I want to express and not enough words to use. Acting helps me express myself more, because I know all the words. and I can apply the emotion and make people understand the Created World and the people in it. I love being able to do that. For some reason with writing, its .... I dunno. Its a lot harder. I guess that's why its hard for me to consider myself a writer.
source                                                      source
 
Speaking of acting, the community college is going to put on a musical this Spring that actually sounds clean and fun and something I could act in. Its called Man of La Mancha. It sounds really fun and, as a bonus, my singing teacher is playing the lead role. And I love my singing teacher. and getting a chance to work with him would be amazing, he could teach me so much. People, I need you all to pray that, if I do audition, I get in. I'll probably try it out. please pray for me, it would really help. This is a .... a pretty big deal for me. I've been looking for something like this for a while, it would be lovely to be able to act and feel a part of something. Plus, I could actually act and not have a some sister come barging in and stare at me all like....

 
Besides those things, my week has been pretty lay back. I did have a lovely Epiphany though. For those of you who don't know, Epiphany is the day the Wiseman found Our Lord and presented Him with gifts, twelve days after Christmas. (See, the 12 days of Christmas are AFTER Christmas not before. Do take note.) We have a very special tradition where we set aside a present or two on Christmas and don't open them until the Epiphany, so we kind of get a little Christmas after. It keeps the anticipation in the house and it makes the Days of Christmas very special for my family. The wiseman even come and leave a few extra things under the tree. Its all very awesome.

We have a luscious breakfast
 

We put in the Wiseman
 
And then we have our own, special little Christmas.

 
My gifties!!
 

The bowtie isn't actually an Epiphany gift but I wanted to show it off to all of you. Aren't they all so lovely?  Especially the Jamies Dodgers. I'm going to save them to have on hand when I watch Eleven regenerate; You know, something to console myself. I actually do want to watch that Christmas Special. Yes, its going to be heart-wrenching and sad and I'm going to sob and flail, but it also looks really good and as much as I hate to see Matt go, I am a bit excited for the Twelfth. I just wish we didn't have to say goodbye to the Eleventh to see him. Its going to be very hard goodbye.


We finished off the evening with Despicable Me 2, and you guys, it was adorable! I really enjoyed it and it more than met my expectations. I really loved Lucy too, she is so cute and crazy - the type of best friend I would have. You should watch it. Really. Go watch it.
 
 
 
Well, that's all for now! I'll probably be back soon with some sort of fun exciting thing that isn't so sad and sappy. Maybe by that time I'll be well again too. Until then!!--------

*KEVINLIVES!*
 
God Bless!
~Bella

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Pile of good things

Pile of good things